Art Gallery: Colonel Tim McCoy

1932

1935

1938

The Further Adventures of Chance Purdue

Following up on yesterday's Forgotten Books review of The DADA Caper, here are two more visits with Chance Purdue:

From The Reggis Arms Caper (1979):

___Brandy plucked at the tiny blue tufts on the bedspread.
___She said impossible.
___She said just impossible.
___She said men have never meant a blessed thing to me.
___She said a few have been so-so in bed and it stops right there.
___She said I wouldn’t give you a plugged peso for a wagonload of the bastards.
___She said they’re lazy and stupid and hopelessly incompetent.
___She said they’re everything I can’t possibly use and I have to go and fall in love with one.
___She said it just makes me sick.
___I shrugged.
___I said don’t feel bad Brandy it’s probably just a mistake.
___Brandy’s eyes flashed nasty little sparks.
___She said mistake?
___She said mistake hell.
___She said the first time you blundered in here you were six feet tall.
___She said now you look like a fugitive from Mt. Rushmore.
___She said you have a golden halo twice the size of a mill wheel.
___She said the goddam thing just hangs there and shines in my eyes.
___She said I get a great big thrill just watching you scratch your ass.
___She said when you touch me I light up like a goddam carnival and when you aren’t near me I wish to Christ I was dead and buried.
___She said does that sound like a mistake to you?

From The Radish River Caper (1981):

___Suicide Lewisite sat in gloomy silence.
___I said so what’s on your mind?
___I said you didn’t come all the way from Radish River just to step on my toe.
___Suicide Lewisite said no I’m here to hire you to investigate the Radish River Possumcats.
___He said we’ll pretend you’re some kind of sports reporter and by associating with my players you may be able to find out what the trouble is.
___I said I already know what the trouble is.
___I said you got no offense.
___I said you also got no defense.
___Suicide Lewisite said yes but there must be a reason for this.
___He said if it’s dissension I got to know about it.
___He said this team isn’t as bad as it looks and right now I’m angling for the one player who could turn it all around.
___He said if I get him we still got a shot at the bacon and I might not commit suicide as soon as expected.
___I said if he’s that good why isn’t he in the National Football League?
___Suicide Lewisite said well I understand that he’s just a bit on the eccentric side.
___He said can you be in Radish River by Saturday?
___I said hell I can be in New Zealand by Saturday.

Forgotten Books: The DADA Caper by Ross H. Spencer

Ross H. Spencer most likely did NOT invent a whole new style of storytelling. I’m guessing his peculiar technique had been used before. But when The DADA Caper was unleashed upon the world in 1978, it was certainly new to me. And probably to most other folks too.

Just what is that style? In a nutshell, it’s very short chapters with one-sentence paragraphs and no quotation marks. Some chapters read more like poetry than prose.

Most folks thought The DADA Caper was pretty cool back in '78, and it was successful enough for Spencer to follow up with four more adventures of detective Chance Purdue. I remember reading three of them. I suppose the gag could get stale after a while, but on this first reading in over twenty years it was fresh and new, and a nice interlude between “normal” works of fiction.

Here’s a sample chapter. Yep, this is a complete chapter:

___Chance Purdue.
___That is my name.
___Private Detective.
___That was my occupation.
___I handle anything.
___That was my slogan.
___Room 506 Braddock Building.
___That was my address.
___One-year lease.
___Three hundred a month.
___That was my mistake.

Here’s another, also complete, chapter:

___Betsy would breeze into the office about eleven in the morning.
___Almost every day.
___Betsy worked nights usually.
___She would sit in the client’s chair.
___After she had dusted it.
___With wild swooping motions.
___So I would know that she knew nobody had sat in it.
___Betsy would lean back and cross her long legs.
___Betsy wore very short skirts.
___And black underclothing.
___Most of the time.
___She would say how goes it Philo?
___I would shrug.
___I would say oh just great.
___Betsy would say how good is just great?
___I would say right now I am running down a few missing space capsules for NASA.
___Betsy would toss her head.
___Her blonde hair would shimmer.
___Her pale blue eyes would twinkle.
___She would say horsecrap.
___Then she would say I’ll take you to lunch.
___I would say okay.

And the fun doesn’t stop there. Instead of numbers or titles, each chapter is introduced with a few words of wisdom from an old coot named Monroe D. Underwood, who also drifts in and out of the story. A few samples:

…oncet there was a woman who took no for an answer…they stuffed her and put her in a museum…

…you show me a man what asks questions first and I’ll show you a man what is still looking for a right answer…

…oncet I knowed a man who had seven sons…named all of the Horatio…soon as they growed up they lynched him…

…feller what said every cloud got a silver lining didn’t know aluminum foil when he seen it…

I read this book in about two hours and came away happy. So yeah, I’ll be moving on to the next two already in my collection. Will I seek out books 4 and 5? We’ll see.

Check out all of this week’s fabulous Forgotten Books at pattinase.

A Fistful of Legends: "Big Enough" by Chuck Tyrell

When Chuck Tyrell takes you to the Old West, it’s the real thing. That’s because he grew up there - in Arizona to be exact - and has spent a lifetime learning the history.

In “Big Enough,” one of two Tyrell tales in this anthology, we meet “Kid” McCullough, a teenage ranch girl who catches a wild filly she calls Big Enough. She’s doing all right until three men escape jail and pay a visit to the secluded canyon she’s using as a corral. She’d been warned what men want and what might happen if she was caught there alone, but refused to be frightened off. Now she must face the consequences.

The first-person narration in this tale rings true, as does the detail of the landscape, the weapons and the horsecraft. Mr. Tyrell knows what he’s writing about - and it shows. And as always, he delivers a fine story. 

Chuck Tyrell is the author of five Black Horse Western novels (so far) with another due out later this year. Several of his titles are currently available on Amazon (US), including Guns of Ponderosa (below). He shares his knowledge of Old West fact and lore on his highly-recommended blog, The Outlaw Trail.

It's been a while since I've listed all 21 legends in Fistful, so here's the complete line-up:
INTRODUCTION by James Reasoner
DEAD MAN TALKING by Derek Rutherford
BILLY by Lance Howard
LONIGAN MUST DIE! By Ben Bridges
THE MAN WHO SHOT GARFIELD DELANY by I J Parnham
HALF A PIG by Matthew P Mayo
BLOODHOUND by C. Courtney Joyner
MORE THAN MEETS THE EYE by Gillian F Taylor
BIG ENOUGH by Chuck Tyrell
ONE DAY IN LIBERTY by Jack Giles
SHADOWS ON THE HORIZON by Bobby Nash
ON THE RUN by Alfred Wallon
THE GIMP by Jack Martin
VISITORS by Ross Morton
THE NIGHTHAWK by Michael D George
THE PRIDE OF THE CROCKETTS by Evan Lewis
DARKE JUSTICE by Peter Avarillo
ANGELO AND THE STRONGBOX by Cody Wells
CRIB GIRLS by Kit Churchill
MAN OF IRON by Chuck Tyrell
CASH LARAMIE AND THE MASKED DEVIL by Edward A Grainger
DEAD MAN WALKING by Lee Walker

Art Gallery: Park Avenue Hunt Club

1936

1940

1936

"Dutch Treat" - an unreprinted Paul Cain story

Paul Cain, aka Peter Ruric (real name George Sims) is best remembered for his ultra-tough novel Fast One (reviewed HERE). But he also sold 12 short stories to Black Mask, one to Detective Fiction Weekly and one to Star Detective. Seven of those Black Mask tales were collected in the Avon paperback Seven Slayers in 1946, and that book is now back in print.

Two more stories have been reprinted elsewhere.  "Trouble Chaser", from Black Mask, appeared in the 1995 book , Hard Boiled: An Anthology of American Crime Stories, and "Sockdolager" is in a replica of the April 1936 Star Detective published by Adventure House.

But as far as I know, Cain's other five stories have never been reprinted, and I think that's a shame. A few months back I offered scans via email of two of those tales: "555" from Detective Fiction Weekly and "Chinaman's Chance" from Black Mask, and requests are still coming in. There are a lot of hungry Paul Cain fans out there.

Well, I recently discovered I had a third unreprinted story, and this is it, from Black Mask of December 1936 (see cover below). If you'd like scans of this 9-page tale, shoot me email at delewis1@hotmail.com and I'll be happy to send it to you. "555" and "Chinaman's Chance" are still available too.

And if anyone out there has scans of the remaining two stories to share, I'd be mighty pleased to see them. Those stories are: "Hunch" from Black Mask March 1934, and "Death Song" from Black Mask January 1936.

I posted this cover some months back when discussing Lester Dent, with the following remarks:

The artist took a few liberties here. Dent's Oscar Sail dresses all in black, while this guy has blue trousers and a green shirt. Still, this is based on a scene from the story. Private eye Sail visits his client in her hotel room (not on a boat, as seen here), where she's in bed with the covers pulled up around her neck. When he pulls the covers down, he discovers she's tied up.

Dent's two Oscar Sail stories were his only sales to Black Mask. There undoubtedly would have been more had editor Joe Shaw not left the magazine soon after their appearance.

"Sail" from Nov. 1936, can be found in The Hard-Boiled Omnibus (edited by Shaw, 1946 & 1952), Tough Guys & Dangerous Dames (1994), and EQMM 11/53 (as "V Marks the Spot").

"Angelfish" was reprinted in Ron Goulart's The Hardboiled Dicks (1967), and The Hard-boiled Detective (1977), along with EQMM 6/47 and the EQ Anthology 1966 (as "Tropical Disturbance").

Who needs Rogaine?

(click to enlarge)

from the back cover of Argosy July 23, 1938

A New Western Story by Richard Prosch

I'm pleased to report that renowned Western blogger Richard Prosch has now had a second Western story published on The Western Online. This tale, like his first, features hardbitten John Coburn, a man with a big reputation who fears his best years are behind him.

Coburn's past exploits have earned him the nickname The Peregrine. To some that name commands respect, in others it incites challenge or prompts derision. Now Coburn just wants to get along, but trouble has a way of finding him, and backing down is not part of his make up.

For a proper introduction, I suggest you start with the first of the series, "Last Day at Red Horizon," then move right on to the new story, "Regina's War." If you're not a Richard Prosch fan already, these two tales are sure to do the trick.

Here are the direct links:
"Last Day at Red Horizon"
"Regina's War"

And just to whet your Western appetite, here are the opening paragraphs of "Regina's War":

An awkward leap brought him down on the hardpan, bones crunching, guts piling into his throat. He refused to give in, but John Coburn was wearing out fast. He hauled himself to his feet and, stifling the urge to curse, spit into the wind. "You want to try that again?" he said.  

Coburn uncoiled in the air like a whip, both hands grasping wildly for purchase. This time he caught hold, and the bull calf bellowed with rage, his back hooves kicking wildly. With both hands clamped around its tail, Coburn growled, "You ain't going nowhere now!" But another kick made him a liar, and he hit the ground.

Lightning flashed. Ignoring the taste of blood on his lips, Coburn looked at a far distant tide of green and black flowing up from the horizon toward the evening sun. Some good-sized hailstones in them clouds, he thought. As the thunder rolled over him, Coburn stood and watched the calf lope away. 

This time he cursed.

This is great stuff! Enjoy the stories at The Western Online, then be sure to pay Rich a visit over at Meridian Bridge.