The Crockett Lifestyle: Table Lamp

A passel of nice table lamps came out of the Crockett Craze, but this Premco model from 1955 just might be the Cadillac of the bunch. Just right for relaxing in your Davy Crockett slippers to read Davy's autobiography (recommended), one his many biographies (some yes, some no), Davy Crockett comics, or past issues of the Almanack. Or, if you're of a more artistic bent, work on your Davy Crockett coloring book. Perfectly complements your b'ar skin rug and imitation log-cabin paneling. Davy suggests you Go Ahead! and spend the two or three hundred bucks necessary to snag one on eBay.

The Crockett Lifestyle: Bandana

Here's proof that the old tale of Davy dying at the Alamo was nothing but banana oil. Obviously he lived on to bust broncs in the Old West, as depicted on this fine silk bandana. Perfect for everything from blowing your nose to masking your face as you hold up the local convenience store. Legend has it Jesse James wore one exactly like this.

The Crockett Lifestyle: Forks

To better admire the fine engraving on these forks, click on the photo and see the BIG version. After just a few days using this quality flatware, you'll never eat store-bought vittles again. You'll be out shootin' b'ars and fryin' 'em up on a wood stove. You'll be shuckin' your own corn and diggin' your own 'taters. But after a hard day's work, be sure an' come on back to the Almanack for your next lesson in livin' The Crockett Lifestyle.

The Crockett Lifestyle: Bedspread

You’ll sleep tight and dream of glory with this embroidered cotton bedspread. And when wash day comes, you’ll want to skip the clothes dryer and hang it out for the neighbors to admire. The perfect complement to your Crockett pajamas, nightlight and alarm clock. And Hugh Hefner thinks he has it good.

The Crockett Lifestyle: Bike Seat Cover.

Be the envy of every Baby Boomer on the block when you strap this genuine cowhide seat cover onto your mountain bike, Harley or unicycle. Padded with genuine antique fleece to pamper your posterior. I can see the fighting Indian, log cabin and bear in the background, but if you can figure out the image on the lower left you have better eyes than I. Guesses?

The Crockett Lifestyle: Ashtray.

Imagine crushing your butts in one of these! Whether you're leadin' the wagon train (top), herdin' wild horses (bottom) or just relaxing in front of the TV enjoying John Wayne's Alamo,
this genuine fine china ashtray is the perfect excuse to stick with the habit. If they started remanufacturing these, smoking would probably become socially acceptable again. (Also makes a swell candy dish.)

The Crockett Lifestyle: Slippers.

As you'll discover if you watch this blog long enough, it's possible to furnish your entire house and outfit your person from head to toe with Davy Crockett merchandise. Case in point: These classy fleece-lined slippers. Davy wants me to buy him a pair of these babies, but as they've been out of production since the fifties, they now cost the earth. Until I win the lottery, he'll have to struggle along with his 175-year-old mocassins.